Disclaimer: this post is irrelevant to anything. It only contains my perspective on being an adult.
I believe everyone will experience this. This is very natural and normal for every human being on this planet. I’m not exaggerating, I’m just seeing the situation as it is.
I am still 24 years old. Life is…new. Every day can be either very different or very monotone. Looking back to high school, I feel like this stage of life is a simple and slow-phase subject with real-life consequences – and it affects me and the people around me. It’s simply easy to do, but I am an overthinker and there’s no word ‘easy’ in my dictionary. It’s difficult, but I feel amazing that I experience this stage of life.
There’s a reason why people always say this: “When you’re burned out or livid, take some deep breaths and let them all out slowly.” It never worked on me before. Yet, lately, I have been trying it and it amazingly works every time. Just…let it go. Just let it all be a sincerity. It’s difficult, but I feel amazing that I can control my anger with this simple solution.
What about deeper emotions? Not about anger, pique, or even regret – but more about sorrow, hopelessness, or deeper pain in your heart? I let myself be them. I let myself for a day or two to become the sadness. I let myself crying. It felt horrible. It felt useless. I felt useless. However, there’s always sunrise after the dark night. The next day I felt normal and fine. I felt relieved. These deeper feelings suck, big time. It’s difficult for me to get through this situation, but I feel amazing that I can feel those feelings. They make my heart smarter and more aware of various situations.
Being an adult means that I have a lot of roles. Controlling how to switch roles is a never-ending lesson for me. This is the best subject so far. I always feel challenged when it comes to switching roles. What roles am I talking about? Being an employee, a daughter, a friend, a work colleague, an aunty, a little sister, and more. Switching roles from an employee to a daughter to a friend needs way more energy than I thought. Producing the energy and maintain it throughout the day is complicated. But that’s the fun part, right? It’s difficult, but I feel amazing that I happen to think about all of these stuff.
Similar to switching roles, the older I am the more I need to be balanced. Who doesn’t want to be balanced in his/her life when we talk about balance? The more balanced you are, the more perfect life you have. You got it all under control. Well, I don’t buy that. I believe a human has the most perfect form of all living creatures, but the life of a human is not perfect. Nobody has that perfect life. Every time I want to be balanced, I can’t reach it because I fuel myself with the feeling of over-wanting. It’s ridiculous. So, I tried to loosen up and I feel better. It never gets easy to reach balance and live in harmony when I, again, fuel myself with explosive feelings. But this never gets boring and I feel amazing I can learn over and over again about reaching my balance.
This adulthood would always be a difficult subject, but it’d always give me the feeling of amazement and curiosity about life. Yup, life. Cliché but true.
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